Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Dealing with the Comments

It happened again!  Same place, same pool – in fact, I was actually wondering if it were the same kid.

If you’ve been following this blog, you would remember that I wrote about an incident that happened to us last year while we were at this same beach resort.  This weekend, while spending some time with family, it was as if we had a replay of events.  

Hamilo Coast in Nasugbu Batangas
There was this very lively chatterbox of a boy who decided that I was to be his playmate at the pool.  Actually, I was more of a passive sounding board to him, which was not new to me since Kuya does this to me almost all the time.  Apart from showing me his treasure (15 pieces of shells taken from the beach area), the little boy asked me what my order was for his make believe fast food resto. As with my kids, I decided to play along and ordered French fries.  Would you believe he charged me $450 for it – yes, in dollars!  (Perhaps he forgot he was in the Philippines).  Of course I told him it was too expensive and that was when he noticed my little girl. 

He asked me “why like that” pointing to Nina.  I asked him what he meant about the “why like that” comment and he repeated it and then as if to explain further, put his hands on the sides of his face and pulled them down, adding that her eyes were like that of a puppy's. 

at the indoor playground
Look, I know my daughter is cute, I will not object to that, but she is definitely not canine looking! 

Again, being at a loss for words, I simply told him that of course she did not look like a dog and that we all look different from one another.  Perhaps he felt that a long lecture was next or maybe his attention span could not take anything more than that and the little chatterbox moved away in search of some of the pebbles and shells that he threw into the pool, much to my relief.

Some time after that, while I was out of the pool and Nina was with her Yaya, I heard some kids ask her as well why Nina looked different and because I told Yaya to be tactful in dealing with those comments, she turned Nina away and commented that in fact she was a beautiful baby while giving her a kiss (great job, Yaya!)

I know we could have done way much better but incidents like this always catch me when I’m off guard.  In as much as I know I need to explain to them (the young ones most especially) that all children are made differently and that Nina was born with Aperts and went through an operation, but sometimes too much information might distract them from the lesson that I want them to learn.  Perhaps I arm myself with witty counter-statements that would at least create a impact on these kids so that the next time they meet someone who looks different, they would know what to say.  So how would you do it?  Do you have any witty lines in mind?

With Kuya and her cousin Migs

Oh yeah, a few minutes after I ranted about the incident on Facebook, I saw this post on a friend's wall.  Everything happens for a reason so I know that I was meant to read this post:  

Wherever we go, there will always be people who will judge us (physically, mentally.. everything). It will HURT... but this shouldn't bring us down because God made us this way. All we have to do is to pray for those kind of people, surrender them to God (no evil thoughts.. for it will not bring glory to God..It will not please Him) and be thankful to God for designing us the way we are now. 

~"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know them well." - Psalm 139:14

It's a difficult learning process - for me especially.  But I know I'll get there.  But it is without any doubt in my mind that my daughter is a wonderful work of God and that in His eyes (and in mine) she is perfect.  No matter what other people may say.

Hey, I still need those witty comeback lines so that I don't punch someone's face the next time this happens, so help me God!  Leave a message if you have any :)

1 comment:

  1. my best answer would be: because she is special and God made her that way so you can see her beauty inside. :-)